Acharei Kedoshim 5785

I am overwhelmed by the generosity, love and support that so many of you have provided to Dona and Kenn Casey. Dona and I have had several conversations and she is grateful, beyond words, for our Beth El family and Jewish Community of East Connecticut’s expression of love to her and to Kenn.

Acharei Kedoshim 2025

The Rambam (Maimonides) asks a most interesting question related to one theme in our Torah reading for this Shabbat. What if someone dies before one can say they are sorry to that individual? Is there a way to atone? Is there a way to provide restitution to that individual if they are already in the ground?

How often do I hear from individuals that they wish they had the opportunity to share a thought of joy or a misgiving with a loved one? “If only I had the chance I would tell my loved one how much I loved them, or I would have said I was sorry for something I had done. Or I would have allowed them to express their remorse or their love. But I pulled back from them, put a distance between us, or simply excluded them from my life!”

Maimonides in his monumental theological halachic work the Mishneh Torah offers one means of atonement:

Someone who sins against his fellow, and the fellow dies before he can ask him for forgiveness, he should bring ten people and stand them by his grave and say in front of them, “I have sinned against the Lord, God of Israel and against this certain person because I did such-and-such to him.” And if he owed him money, he should give it to his heirs. If he does not know who the heirs are he should give it to the court and confess. (Repentance 2:11)

Imagine the power of those standing who witness this individual bare their soul out over the grave of that individual. In one sense they are standing as a minyan, attesting to the sincerity of the words. The value of the minyan at this moment is just as important as when we pray together the kedushah. It is the connection of a community, hearing and understanding.  In a simplistic yet powerful means they are making the statement that we are here for you. As such the community is providing a non-judgmental listening ear for that individual. Perhaps, following the statements they will comfort the individual and express words of encouragement. On another level, just as on Yom Kippur we join together to offer our words of atonement, the scene is one that is quite similar and connects us spiritually to our thoughts and our words. (A section of our reading for this Shabbat, Acharei Mot/Kedoshim, is read as our Torah reading on Yom Kippur morning.)

In Eicha Rabbah we are brought to another dimension:

Rabbi Acha said, “What does one who prays with a congregation resemble? A number of people made a crown for the King. A poor man comes along and places his portion in it. The King says, “Just because of the poor man, shall I not accept the crown?” The King accepts it, and when he places the crown on his head, the poor man’s portion is included. Likewise, if there are ten righteous men worshiping, and a wicked person stands among them, G-D says, “Just because of this sinner, should I not accept their worship?” (Eicha Rabbah 3:8)

In this instance the power of the minyan provides the sinner with the understanding that it is not just based solely on his or her merit. It is on the merit of everyone present that his/her words are accepted by God. Hopefully he or she may now accept that their remorse has been expressed and accepted.

Perhaps the ceremony ends with the minyan responding Amen. The numerical value of the Hebrew letters אמן is 91. The same number makes up the Hebrew letters of angel, מלאך.The great halachic and theological modern Orthodox rabbi, Rav Moshe Feinstein made the connection between the two, stating, “Every Amen creates a guardian angel.” As such, the presence of the minyan provides that individual with a guardian angel who hopefully will bring a modicum of peace into his/her inner being, and hopefully that guardian angel will watch over him/her and provide him/her with protection for the future.

But here is what is quintessential to this whole thought: take a moment and reflect. Is there someone who might need to hear words from you of love and thankfulness or even of remorse, regret or an apology? And perhaps your soul might need to feel relief and gratitude by expressing your thoughts and feelings. I know that in many instances, at least in expressing appreciation, gratitude and love, the question might best be stated: “so, why wait?”

Bring them home now!!!

Am Yisrael Chai!!!

Shabbat Shalom,

Rabbi K