Vayakhel - March 9

Our Torah reading for this Shabbat, Vayakhel, continues with the narrative related to the building of the Mishkan, God’s house in the wilderness. We will also read the portion known as Shekalim, which is the first for the four readings which not only announce the coming of Passover, but provide us with thoughts related to preparation.  Shekalim reminds us of the importance of financially supporting the Jewish community, and most importantly the religious institutions where tefillah (prayer) and limud (study), are the focus, where community comes together to express not only our prayers, but also our thanksgiving and our regrets and frustrations.

What should one recite if one receives bad news?  A recent conversation with a friend indicated that she was lucky with having so many friends surrounding her, but a medical diagnosis was not so lucky. 

We have been having an ongoing texting conversation related to different ways of understanding the current reality. In one conversation I suggested was that there is a personal angel that watches over us, so that we can fulfill the one thing in life that we were brought here on earth to fulfill. Yes there are many other mitzvoth we fulfill, but there is one that we have been destined to complete.  That angel watches over us to ensure that we can fulfill it.  I then commented, “May the angel watch over you and those who are providing you with medical care.” Secondly, while we often speak of the angel in terms of a celestial being, that angel can also be the many friends that you have who are there for you.

In my studies for this Shabbat, I happened to come across the following statement in the Mishna in Berachot related to how we should reflect upon not only the good, but the bad:

“One is obligated to recite a blessing for the bad that befalls him just as he recites a blessing for the good that befalls him, as it is stated: “And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your might” (Deuteronomy 6:5). The mishna explains this verse as follows: “With all your heart” means with your two inclinations, with your good inclination and your evil inclination, both of which must be subjugated to the love of God. “With all your soul” means even if God takes your soul. “And with all your might” means with all your money, as money is referred to in the Bible as might. Alternatively, it may be explained that “with all your might” means with every measure that He metes out to you; whether it is good or troublesome, thank Him.”

Maimonides, the Rambam, in his code of Jewish Law, states:

“When a person hears favorable tidings, he should recite the blessing: "Blessed are You, God, our Lord, King of the universe, who is good and does good." If he hears bad tidings, he should recite the blessing: "Blessed [are You...] the true Judge."

A person is obligated to recite a blessing over undesirable occurrences with a positive spirit, in the same manner as he joyfully recites a blessing over desirable occurrences.”

I can just imagine how many of us might react to such a statement: Gee God, thanks for nothing; thanks for the struggle, thanks for the pain; thanks for putting me in this compromising situation. I am quite sure there are many more such phrases, none of which I can print in a rabbinic column.

Blaming God might seem like the right response. But as Rabbi Harold Kushner z”l, taught and lived with the philosophy that it was not Hashem’s doing. Nor should one assume that one is being punished. Happenstance, as my friend stated, living in a world where our biological makeup comes in contact with nature, has created not only the good, but also the challenges and fate.  And so stating the words Barukh Dayan Ha’Emet, may be a theological statement that allows one to express frustration and lead to the acceptance needed to move forward in life,

Many of us have actually followed the Rambam’s wording when our loved one dies and we cut kriah (the tearing of the garment.) The Hebrew words are Barukh Dayan Ha’emet, Blessed or praised is the true judge.” I would prefer to read it as the judge of truth. Just as we accept the good, we must accept the truth, no matter how difficult or incomprehensible it is for us.

Reciting the Mourner’s Kaddish provides us with the ability to not only accept the reality but also provides us with a mechanism to continue on in faith that God will be there for us, even in bad times.

I am reminded of the Israeli soldier who served in combat during the Yom Kippur war. He lost his leg in combat. One morning he was seen on the street carrying his tallit and tefillin to shul. He was mocked by some on the street. “Hey, what are you doing? Are you that foolish to think that Hashem will hear your prayer and grow you anew leg?”  “No” replied the young soldier, I am asking God to give me the strength and courage to continue living just the way I am.”

None of us ever want to find ourselves in situations where we might need to recite the phrase:“Barukh Dayan Ha’Emet.”  But life does not always offer us the good; and when that happens, we find meaning through the words of our tradition and through the friends and God who helps us walk through the difficult moments in life.

Shabbat shalom.

Rabbi K.